


knives and ivory

by codedredalert



Series: Onepiecestuck [1]
Category: Homestuck, One Piece
Genre: Alien Culture, Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Homestuck Fusion, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Discrimination, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Getting Together, M/M, Marriage of Convenience, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Violence, Worldbuilding, insecure Sanji, one piece characters as homestuck trolls, unconventional romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2020-01-20 21:22:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18533413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/codedredalert/pseuds/codedredalert
Summary: "I don't know why you're trying to pass, but I get it. Always being surrounded by people who are a different colour.”Blood comes in every colour of the rainbow, and your blood colour determines everything -- social status, opportunities, your worth. Wearing a colour that doesn't match your blood is forbidden under pain of death, unless you're in an officially registered relationship with someone that colour.Sanjii is a blueblood who can't pass for yellow in a million years but still tries to anyway. Llhaaw is a yellowblood who decides to intervene on a whim.(Can read even if you don't know homestuck! It'll just read like a sci-fi.)





	knives and ivory

**Author's Note:**

> Social caste is determined by blood colour. From lowest/commoner to highest/royalty: red, brown, yellow, olive (green), jade (green), teal (green/blue), cerulean (blue), indigo (blue), purple, violet, fuchsia.  
> A person is allowed 4 registered relationships or "quadrants". The 4 relationships are hearts, diamonds, clubs, and spades. 
> 
> Thanks to [donutsandcoffee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/donutsandcoffee/pseuds/donutsandcoffee) for patiently beta-ing and making sure this is still readable for non-homestucks.

Trafal Llhaaw's psionics gave him approximately two seconds' warning before the legislacerators kicked the door in.

Instantly, the inside of the Baratie was colours and mayhem, the screams of patrons, the clash of weapons and the splatter of blood across the tablecloths, the walls, the floor. Llhaaw counted ten dead, easily, from the safety of his barrier. Beside him, his crew were calm but weapons ready, on the off-chance that the ‘lacerators had a psychic with them.

“Oi, what's this about?” A voice rang out with authority, and it was unmistakably blue, blue, _blue_. The harmonics of that voice went bone-deep to every lowblood in the room. Thousands of years of genetic memory demanded obedience.

The crowd stilled and turned as one to see a tall waiter with handsome curled ram-horns step out from a staff-only door.

Llhaaw's first thought was “he's trying too hard”. The blueblood waiter--who did he think he was fooling? -- had bleached his hair yellow. He wore a yellow shirt under his suit, and no blue whatsoever, not even a personal sign.

Llhaaw reached out in that space only psychics could, and felt nothing from Waiter. He was a psychic null. There was no warning ozone in the air, no static in the back of Llhaaw’s teeth. Yellows were prized precisely because almost all of them were strong psychics-- there was a reason why people referred to the _gold_ standard for starship engines. Waiter had chosen a difficult colour to impersonate. Llhaaw couldn't help but wonder why.

“Are you the highest-blooded staff here?” a ‘lacerator demanded, stepping forward to stand smartly before Waiter. The personal sign on the 'lacerator's uniform was teal and the ranks looked pretty high, though Llhaaw wasn't sure of the exact title. The ‘lacerator hesitated, and did not add a ‘sir’ to the end of his sentence.

“I can speak on behalf of the owner,” replied Waiter, neatly avoiding the question. Next to the ‘lacerator, it became glaringly obvious that Waiter’s dark grey skin was just a shade short of full adult black. “What’s this about?”

“Your establishment is harbouring criminals.”

Waiter glanced round the blood splattered tables and walls. His hair fell in a swoop over one eye. It gave him an air of casual disregard.

“We don’t screen or turn away people who come to eat. That’s your job,” said Waiter dismissively. “If you’re finished, take the bodies and leave.”

The ‘lacerator bristled, clearly not accustomed to taking orders. Expected, this was a lowblood neighbourhood and most people would be no higher than yellow.

“And what colour did you say you were?” asked the ‘lacerator lowly.

Next to Llhaaw, Shachi breathed a soft “oh shit” and Pengwn elbowed him hard. Llhaaw privately agreed with the sentiment. If Waiter said blue, as he clearly was, ‘lacerator would bring up bloodcaste impersonation laws, as if anyone cared about some highblood slumming it. If Waiter lied and said yellow, ‘lacerator could either leverage his own tealblood status, or call Waiter out for bloodcaste impersonation anyway.

“I didn’t,” replied Waiter, stalling.

“Alright, wise guy. Disclose your bloodcaste or I’ll cull you here,” snapped the ‘lacerator. This was getting painful to watch.

“Fine, since you clearly can’t see what’s right in front of you. I’m ye-”

Llhaaw couldn’t sit there and watch this happen, it was too cringe-worthy. He stood. There was a ripple of alarm through the perimeter of ‘lacerator grunts.

Llhaaw slowly and deliberately picked his way over to where Waiter and the head ‘lacerator were squaring off. They turned and took in Llhaaw's bright yellow hoodie, his classic psychic build-- all long and no muscle because his body fed his powers as its first and only priority.

"My diamond can wear my colour as he chooses, legislacerator," asked Llhaaw, picking up a knife from a table along the way, giving it a casual flip in his hand. It was weighted well, the Baratie was a nice establishment, despite being in the not-so-nice corner of a redblood neighbourhood. He didn’t need the knife to be intimidating, he knew he felt like an oncoming storm to anyone with decent hornsense-- static, ozone and stifling thunderclouds.

The 'lacerator hesitated and Waiter looked at Llhaaw with a raised eyebrow. Apparently, Waiter’s eyebrow was curled into a spiral at the end. Llhaaw looked away before he snickered.

“Imperial docterrorist Trafal Llhaaw,” said the ‘lacerator, recognising him. The ‘lacerator's eyes narrowed in suspicion. “You don’t have registered quadrants.”

Time to see if Waiter would pick up on the lifeline Llhaaw was throwing him here. Llhaaw met Waiter’s eyes.  

"You said you would get us registered, sugar." Llhaaw deliberately dropped his voice into a bedroom purr, indecently soothing and part sulky. The ‘lacerator's jaw dropped and he hurriedly covered his fangs with a hand to not be taken as a threat. Waiter's lone visible eyebrow shot up even more before his features carefully smoothed out.

"Sorry, things got busy with this shitty restaurant, babe." He dropped his voice as well, the blueblood tones kicking in again, but the harmonics confused, completely unclear what quadrant he was presenting in. Llhaaw would bet 50k beri that Waiter never had a quadrantmate in his life.

Llhaaw indicated the door with a tilt of his head, gold eyes locked on the ‘lacerator. Llhaaw was taller than both Waiter and the ‘lacerator, and his upward spiralling horns only emphasised that.

"You should leave," said Llhaaw to the ‘lacerator, and back in the main group, he saw a couple other ‘lacerators flinch. “But if you want a fight--”

Llhaaw tossed the knife up and spun it once with his psionics before it snapped and stayed in mid-air, pointed straight at the legislacerator. The 'lacerator scowled but backed away.

"If you're not registered within the next three nights, I'll come cull both of you," the 'lacerator hissed impotently. He motioned for the grunts to pick up the bodies on the way out.

The ‘lacerators left in a hurry and Waiter sighed.

“Carnei, run the mains to tables four and thirteen. The rest of you on clean-up,” he directed the other waiters. There were a couple of protests, which Waiter ignored. He turned to Llhaaw.

"Can I talk to you?” he asked. He jerked his thumb over a shoulder, to the staff-only door which he came from. "Out back."

Llhaaw’s crew were half out of their seats, still watching for Llhaaw’s okay. Llhaaw waved for Shachi and Pengwn to settle down and nodded to Waiter. Waiter led the way, holding open the door for Llhaaw to step through.

The door led to the kitchens and the moment Llhaaw stepped in, all the cooks started whistling, clapping and jeering.

"Nice job getting hitched, curlbrow!”

"Didn't know you were so loose, Sanjii, preying on the regulars!”

"When were you gonna introduce your palemate, huh Sanjii?”

"Shut up!" Waiter --Sanjii-- snapped at them. “All of you, just shut up.”

He lit up a cigarette as he brushed past Llhaaw to the back door out of the kitchens and into a dimly lit alley. Llhaaw followed, wondering what this conversation might be about. Anger, perhaps, that Llhaaw took liberties to declare publicly that they were together? Posturing, or an attempt to leverage against Llhaaw’s infamy?

Sanjii took a sharp breath and waited for the kitchen door to swing shut before speaking.

"Listen, I don't know what you expect out of this-" started Sanjii, voice low. From here Llhaaw could see his eyes clearly, clear blue against healthy yellow scleras. A well-balanced personality too, if he had calmed himself so quickly from the annoyance he’d begun to show when dealing with the ‘lacerators. Maybe he wasn’t the typical blue.

"I don't expect anything,” interrupted Llhaaw. Sanjii stopped mid-sentence, considering this.

"Then, why?"

Unspoken: _Why did you risk yourself for a stranger? Why did you offer your hand when anyone else would have watched me die?_

"No reason. I just don't like government types. And," Llhaaw paused but the words left him before he was absolutely sure he wanted to speak. "I don't know why you're trying to pass, but I get it. Always being surrounded by people who are a different colour.”

Sanjii nodded once, so it could be mistaken for a simple dip of his head before he looked up into the sky, exposing the vulnerable lines of his throat. It was late for Llhaaw to notice, but Sanjii was definitely a type that some people looked for in a diamond, a deceptively gentle manner and elegant build hiding ridiculous blueblood strength and the tendency to highblood madness.

"You'd be okay being registered?"

The words broke Llhaaw out of his train of thought. Sanjii glanced at Llhaaw’s face, trying to gauge his expression. Sanjii’s own expression was still the cool one he'd displayed in front of the lacerators but now he had a bright blue blush across his face and ears, his skin not quite dark enough to hide it.

When Llhaaw didn’t speak, Sanjii looked away and continued with a nervous half-smile, his free hand running through his bleached hair in a self-soothing manner. Oh, Sanjii was a Type alright. Llhaaw could definitely see his own hands, dark with barely-there tattoos, carding through that hair, maybe dying it back to its natural black.

"Ah, see, I don't really know any yellows and I don't think I can pass for any lower."

Llhaaw refrained from pointing out that Sanjii didn't even pass for yellow as is.

"You got the same problem right? You're wearing blue jeans. Unless you got a blue quadrantmate recently." Sanjii brought his hand up to touch the cigarette between his teeth in an attempt to hide the lower half of his face. His blush was still patently visible.  

"Are you proposing to me?" asked Llhaaw and Sanjii blushed harder. Definitely a virgin, for all he tried to act like a heartthrob playboy.

"Yeah," he said gruffly.

Llhaaw considered this. His quadrants were empty, as was public knowledge. What was less public knowledge was that Llhaaw could break any rule he wanted to, courtesy of the dubious good graces of the Emperor Himself. Still, it was never wise to let debts to Doffla stack up, there was no telling when or how they would be called in.

"Okay," said Llhaaw and Sanjii's cigarette nearly dropped out of his mouth. His jaw snapped shut just in time to keep it from dropping.

"Really?" he asked, dumbfounded. "Just like that? No questions?"

"Aren't you the one who asked?" replied Llhaaw.

"I didn't expect you to say yes!" Sanjii gestured, as if that would help make his point.

"It's mutually beneficial, like you said."

Sanjii lit another cigarette, and stuck it between his teeth right alongside the first one. He puffed hard on the two cigarettes at once, almost absently, then took the cigarettes in hand to point at Llhaaw.

"Don't expect me to cuddle.” Sanjii was trying for a strict tone. It was more endearing than anything. “I'm not a cuddler. Especially not with men."

Somehow, Llhaaw doubted that, but he shrugged.

"That's fine.”

"I smoke.” Sanjii placed the two cigarettes back between his teeth. Did he even realise he had two cigarettes at the same time?

"I can see that."

"No, why are you so calm about this? Shouldn't you protest more?"

"Do you want me to say yes or not?” snapped Llhaaw, slightly annoyed with this back and forth after Sanjii had been the one to propose.

Sanjii looked taken aback.

"I'm just making sure you want this," grumbled Sanjii, hands in his pockets and the unsaid "I'm just making sure you want _me_ " actually made Llhaaw's heart give a pang of genuine romantic pity.

Llhaaw gave a smile, close mouthed but as soft as burning supernovas and distant thunderstorms could be soft.

"I do."

 

**Author's Note:**

> Does anyone actually want to read onepiecestuck in this year of 2019? Is anyone else invested in one piece characters and unconventional romances? Is anyone reading this not a homestuck but just likes sci fi? I'm so curious talk to me.


End file.
